MOVING OUT, MOVING FORWARD || How to Stand Up for Yourself and Trust Your Decisions

One of my main New Year's resolutions was to move out from my current home into a space I could call my own. 

Not just for the sake of having my own place, but because I knew it was time to stand up for myself—time to set boundaries, prioritize my well-being, and take full control of my life.

Deciding to move wasn’t easy. People had opinions. Some thought I was being impulsive, that I should wait until it was more practical or made more sense. But standing up for myself meant tuning out the doubts—both from others and from my inner critic. It meant reminding myself that I am capable, that I am allowed to put myself first, and that I don’t need permission to live life on my own terms.

Now, as I brainstorm for home goods and step into this next chapter, I feel a mix of fear and freedom. But more than anything, I feel proud. Because choosing my happiness and independence is the kind of resolution worth keeping.

Here’s what I’ve learned along the way:

1. Trust Your Instincts: You Know What’s Best for You

People will always have opinions—about where you should live, how you should decorate, and even how you should spend your money. But at the end of the day, you’re the one who has to live with your choices.

You might feel pressure from those around you to make certain decisions, but in the end, we all share the same goals—we’re just taking different paths to get there.

Think back to when you knew a decision was right for you, even if others doubted it. It could be choosing an apartment that felt like home, even though someone else thought it was too expensive or too far. Your gut instinct is often your best guide. Ask yourself: Does this choice align with my long-term happiness, or am I making it to please someone else? If it’s the latter, it’s time to recalibrate. 

2. Setting Boundaries Without Guilt

Family and friends might have expectations about how often you visit, how you spend your money, or what’s considered a ‘good’ decision. But you don’t owe anyone an explanation for doing what’s right for you. If someone pushes back on your choices, use assertive yet kind communication. Try saying: “I appreciate your advice, but I’ve thought this through and feel confident in my decision.” You don’t need to justify yourself beyond that. 

3. The Power of Saying ‘No’ (and When to Say ‘Yes’)

When you’re on your own, you’ll quickly learn that saying ‘yes’ to everything—whether it’s social plans, financial commitments, or obligations—can stretch you thin. The ability to say ‘no’ is one of the strongest forms of self-respect.

That said, it’s just as important to say ‘yes’ to the right things—to opportunities that push you out of your comfort zone, to connections that enrich your life, and to experiences that help you grow. Before committing to something, ask yourself: Will this decision bring me closer to the life I want to build? If the answer is no, don’t be afraid to decline.

4. Advocating for Yourself in Everyday Situations

Whether it’s negotiating rent, asking for time off work, or speaking up when something doesn’t feel right, self-advocacy is a crucial skill. Moving out is an opportunity to practice standing up for yourself in ways both big and small. 

In the “real world,” no one will advocate for you—you’re the only one looking out for yourself at all times. So treat yourself well and stand up for yourself whenever you can.

Start with small wins. If you’re hesitant to advocate for yourself, try it in low-pressure situations first—like asking for a discount on a service or clarifying a charge on a bill. Each time you speak up, you reinforce your ability to do so in more critical moments.

5. Embracing Discomfort: Growth Comes from Doing What’s Hard

Moving out isn’t always easy. There will be moments of doubt, stress, and unexpected challenges. But within those moments lies the greatest opportunity for growth. The discomfort you feel when making tough decisions is proof that you’re stepping into a new level of self-reliance. Instead of fearing discomfort, reframe it. When you feel uncertain, remind yourself: This means I’m growing. This is part of becoming the person I’m meant to be.

Remember, you know what’s best for you. The more you practice standing by your choices, the stronger and more self-assured you’ll become. Here’s to moving forward—one empowered decision at a time.